


Water is Wet

by Duchesse



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Comedy, F/M, Humor, M/M, Reader-Insert, Reader-Interactive, Self-Insert, Selfship, gender-neutral, lucio being the garbage can we love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-15
Updated: 2018-03-15
Packaged: 2019-03-31 20:41:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13982943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Duchesse/pseuds/Duchesse
Summary: After the collapse of the noble house which you came from, Lucio sweeps you under his employment. Despite being you being his favorite, he had an awful way of showing it.[Count Lucio | Reader].





	Water is Wet

“It’s not wet enough. Get me another.”

“How is that even possible?”

“Did I stutter? Fetch me another,  _peasant_.”

Years of etiquette had equipped you for unsavory situations such as these, but it didn’t make handling the pretentious man’s requests. With a grace and reserve unfitting of a servant, you swiped the glass of water onto your tray and immediately left his chambers.

There were still gossip in the halls; whispers of your disgraced heritage and wealth where that blanket of security had been shucked away from you. Truly, your family had been rich in name only, the preconceived idea that you had tumbled to the bottom of the barrel while your family succumbed to the plague were falsities you were too tired to correct.

Honestly, handling that dingy shop that your mother’s side owned sounded far preferable to being an attraction for Lucio to flick crumbs at. His disdain for your family had sprouted some years ago, so you weren’t surprised that the moment his rats whispered in his ear about the complete collapse, he was there to giddily drag you back to the palace under his employment.

“I need another glass,” you announced to the maid piecing together that evening’s feast. She eyed you incredulously, shifting to your face as she wordlessly pressed for an answer. “It wasn’t wet enough.”

No one could claim astonishment with Luicio’s attitude towards you. After all, despite your seething protests, you were his favorite. A fact that presented itself when he turned away all other servants and dumped their responsibilities on you.

Mustering a pleasant smile, you returned to his chambers with the new glass. The ice chimed as it struck the delicate walls, glistening beads of streaking the sides. The oval tray glowed golden and was far too big for the single glass of water, but you kept that to yourself and set the glass next to him.

“Your wet water, Count.” You offered him a head tilt and a bow. “I do hope this is satisfactory.”

Lucio traced your movements from the corner of his eye as he lounged on the cushions, body posed in such a way that you were convinced one of his painters was in the room with you both. And yet, nary there was another soul.

“What was the hold up? You took forever.” He complained, but swept a lavishly clothed arm out and circled the rim of the glass with the tip of his small finger. “Do you even know the concept of urgency?”

“My, I wasn’t aware that you were so in need,” you replied, feigning disappointment. “I should have waited a little longer.”

Your snark was met with an agitated pout, brows furrowed as he gripped the glass only to release a hum of disgust and snap his hand away, shaking the water from his palm.

“What the hell is this, peasant?!”

You deadpanned. “Your wet water.”

“It’s too wet!” he spat, still flinging his hand about as though he had been burned. “Can’t you do anything right?! Get me another!”

At that point, you had half the mind to light him on fire or to smash his face in with your tray. Surely no one would miss him. With an eerily placid smile, you simply picked the glass of water up and took a step closer to him.

“W-What are you doing?” 

Without a word, you chucked the water at his face and placed the glass down easily before turning tail and bursting into a sprint.

The halls filled with an unholy cacophony of shouts and the sharpness of shattering glass, drowned only by thundering footfalls as Lucio gave chase.

No one batted an eye.


End file.
